Q.My daughter is getting married and I want to know is this: she does not want to wear a veil, just a tiara, which is has pearls and small flowers in it along with ivy. I want her to wear a veil, but she says no.. any suggestions?

A1. This is a tricky situation but is it worth spoiling the big day for both of you? If it is really what your daughter wants then nothing would make her happier than to know that she has you on her side. This is a very stressful time for both of you but don't let this one thing be something you quarrel about now or in the future. Every bride looks forward to this day and has this chance to look exactly how she wants to and I am sure you wouldn't take that away from her. And with or without a veil I am sure she will beautiful.
(Answered by Gaynor Cunningham)

A2. My suggestion to you is that you don't want to fall out with your daughter at this late stage. Many brides now choose not to wear a veil and her tiara sounds very pretty. It is her day and the important thing is that she feels relaxed and happy with what she is wearing.
(Answered by Suzie Gillespie)



A3.It’s great that you are taking such an interest in your daughter’s wedding, and that you are considering the options for her. However, please try to remember that it is her wedding, and sometimes girls want different things from their mothers (I know I did!). Some dress designs don’t suit veils, and some brides feel claustrophobic behind veils, which make them inappropriate.

I realise that you would like her to wear a veil, but if she has decided not to wear one, it is really not worth ‘rocking the boat’ so soon to the wedding day. You both should be enjoying the next few days, relaxing and looking forward to the big day! I’m sure that you want your daughter to feel happy and confident on her big day, and if she has decided against a veil that is her decision. Asking her to change puts her in a very awkward position, and making her change her views is likely to cause resentment and friction.

Whilst difficult, please try to respect your daughter’s wishes; and I really do hope that you both have a thoroughly enjoyable day.Very best wishes.
(Answered by Emma Pirie)


A4. It can be very difficult to please everyone when you're planning a wedding. If my own experience is anything to go by, what seems really important to start with, ends up being not so important in the long run.

I think both mother and daughter need to decide what is really important to them both and then maybe come to a compromise. Surely that has nothing to do with what is being worn and more to do with happiness, love and marriage.

I am sure the wedding will be perfect whether the bride is wearing or veil or not. Have a lovely day.
(Answered by Trudy Goldsack)