The Role and Duties of the Parents of the Groom


Traditionally, the groom's parents have found themselves fairly well down wedding the pecking order. This undoubtedly stems from the time when the wedding was paid for by the groom and the bride's family and since the groom's parents didn't contribute financially, their role was consequently a somewhat minor one.

The groom's parents however play a much greater role in the financing of today's weddings however are therefore more involved in most stages of the planning and preparation than they used to be.

Once news of the engagement has been broken it is expected that the parents of the groom should contact the bride's parents to offer their congratulations, welcome their future daughter-in-law into their family and to arrange a time for both sets of parents to meet to discuss arrangements for the wedding.

Both sets of parents should discuss and agree very early on who does what and who pays for what. The mothers, for invariably it is the female who communicate best, should keep in regular contact to keep each other up to date as to the progression of the organisation, to discuss any difficulties that arise, to avoid any misunderstanding or duplication of work and to complain about the selfishness and ingratitude of their respective offspring.

The main financial outlay for the groom's parent was traditionally gifts for the couple and possibly a rehearsal dinner. These days however, the increasing cost of weddings means that the groom's parents are expected to contribute in many other areas, which are best agreed with the bride's family well in advance.

The groom's mother is generally responsible for informing the bride's mother of the number of guests to come from the groom's side of the family.

On the day itself the grooms parents have few duties or responsibilities other than welcoming the guests to the wedding, circulating and chatting at the reception and making sure things go as smoothly as they can.